30 Days of Blogging Honesty: Day 13


Day 13 — I once got so drunk and lost control and this is what I was told I did and have no reason to doubt it…

I do drink, and have even been known to get drunk on occasion. I never forget what I do though, I’m more likely to fall asleep than drink enough to have memory loss. I have a couple of mild drinking stories but nothing major, the best one I can remember is when I wolfed down a cheeseburger someone smuggled into a bar for me.


I had been drinking steadily all afternoon and well into the night without any food so they had deemed some sustenance essential. This resulted in my needing to throw everything up about 10minutes later. I wobbled off to the bathroom and was about to bring everything up when I realised the toilet seat was disgusting but my balance was terrible – who holds onto that sort of thing? There was pee everywhere! So I started making toilet paper mittens, wrapping my hands around and around with loo paper, so that I could hang onto the seat without touching anything. To this day I still think that was a brilliant idea. I used about half a roll though, the mittens were enormous!

By the time I got up the next morning after being helped home (we lived within walking distance) I was well and truly sober and feeling fine-ish (a little groggy and thirsty!) because the alcohol was all in the toilet at some random bar far, far away rather than pumping through my system.

If you’re ever in the same position I would definitely recommend poo paper mittens! Although, if you would prefer to just have dinner instead of getting blind drunk over the day without noticing that might work too.



    • Sleep and Salami

      It creeps up on you, you know? One minute, you’ve decided on a spontaneous trip to a pub after skiving off work early, next thing you know it’s 8 hours later and your boyfriend has 2 faces.

      • happyhippierose

        yes! exactly.

        i’m from florida and i feel like those kind of days would always end with me realizing it was dark out and all around me people were freshly showered, hair and makeup done, wearing nice outfits and i was in a bathing suit all sunburned and disoriented.

      • Sleep and Salami

        Yes! Everyone was all dressed up and ready for a big night and I was still lugging (well, dropping) my files from work around.
        Not some good decision making there…

  1. theferkel

    pee on toilet seats *shudder* there’s nothing worse than a dirty toilet. I’ve been in one in Croatia (unrelated to a drinking story) and they have not flushed for ages and there was a “thing” in the men’s room that was taller than the seat around it… my bf was gagging when he rushed in the women’s loo.. at least the women’s one was just stained – it did not have other things in it.

    • Sleep and Salami

      There’s something about public toilets – I just don’t understand how people treat them. Yuck! Sometimes I think I should look into getting a “She-wee” or something so I never have to deal with the hovering ever again.

      Purse hand gel only covers so many things! *triple shudder*

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